How I Escape the Madness..... I read

Yesterday was the most relaxing day I have had in quite awhile. Sure my fibromyaglia might have been flaring up and I'm still on antibiotics from a nasty infection, but neither one seemed to really bug me.

The last couple of days prior I had been having trouble sleeping, but that was not necessarily a bad thing. I got a ton of house work done and got some good reading time in. I've been picking away here and there at the Sookie Stackhouse Novels by Charlene Harris. I think I'm going to have to break down and buy my own set instead of keeping the ones I have on loan from a friend.

Finally Sunday night I was able to get some decent sleep. I stretched out on the couch to read "Living Dead in Dallas" and to my surprise early Monday morning my boyfriend came out to the living room. I woke up withe the book between me and the couch. My glasses were still on. Apparently I was more tired than I had thought. I had fallen asleep while reading.
A lot of people talk about how reading helps them fall asleep. For the first time in my life that is what happened to me. I have never fallen asleep reading a book before.

I am one of those reader that as soon as I pick up a book of any kind I don't want to stop reading it until the book is finished. I remember years ago when Harry Potter was first gaining popularity that If I had a couple days off or more in a row I would read 13 + hours. The only time I would stop was to eat, sleep, bath, or because my eyes would start to lose focus.

During my middle school years I spent a lot of my free time during the summer  months reading instead of going swimming or what not. One summer I remember having read 26 different Star Wars novels, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, and whatever else I could find that looked interesting.

Given my obsession with books and reading you would think that I could down a novel in a day like my speed reading brother can. Nope. I have learned how to speed read, but do not implement the technique unless it has something to do with studying. I enjoy taking me sweet time with a book.

Alone in the Dark

Most people who meet me or don't know me very well think that I am a very auditory person, and honestly I can see why. I do talk a lot. However what they do not know is how much of a visual person I am. If I am having a conversation with someone, my mind goes running wild and I imagine what is going on and might even try to imagine the scenario and play it out in my head. A similar thing happens when I read a book. I spend a massive amount of time imagining what the characters act like or what would it be like if I was one of the characters in the story. However, I have found most of the time that I am busy imagining what the background looks like. I like to visualize every tree, hill, town, house and so on. This is a perfect example of what it means to be an artist. Sure I might not have or make time to draw or paint anymore on a regular bases, but I find other means to let my artistic ability flow without it putting my life on hold.
 I read a book, work on the Feng Shui of my home, or I write stories.

The upside down snail on the top of the hill is me. This picture represents my struggle with Fibromyalgia and my life.

As of late I have been keeping the book I have been writing "The Tarnished Necklace", on hold to spend time reading, or to work on making my modest little house a home for my boyfriend, his daughter, and myself. I am not too worried about finishing it since I have the whole story plot memorized and have over 1000 pages written down in notebooks waiting to be put together. Sometimes being a good artist means knowing what is more important in life and keeping your priorities in line. Whether it is to enjoy a good book, spending time with your family, making time for your friends, relaxing with a video game, or making time for yourself...... It is all important. Life must go on.

I find it important to make time to enjoy the little things in life instead of allowing my artwork to swallow me up. I don't want to end up mentally insane like Van Gogh and try to slice my ear off or do anything else insane.

"Musical Snails" This piece marks the beginning of my struggle. My mind was all over the place.

 There were times when I was younger where I would get completely sucked into my art that I would actually blow my friends and family off. I would spend hours locked in my room smoking cigarettes, staring at my art projects, and wondering if I was truly finished with a piece or if it was just the start of something else. At one point I became depressed and instead of my art being a venting point for my feelings or a crutch, it became my enemy.
Lucky for me I was able to pull myself out of it and realized what was happening to me. I packed up all my art supplies, stuck them in the closet. I had closed myself in so tight that I thought no one liked me. I felt that my family hated me. I knew that it was I that felt that way and no one else.

Any time I felt the temptation I picked up a book or went out to the local pool hall to hang out with my friends. I even went to the doctor and got anti-depressants. From time to time I still have to take them.

The Pain of Fibromyalgia

This is what being an artist is all about:
1) Visualizing the world around you.
2) Understanding your weak points and working on them.
3) Making time for all the small things in life is important. It brings balance and perspective.

 A real artist knows that art is not all painting and drawing, but rather the art of balance and bringing harmony to ones life. It is an internal struggle of the mind to keep everything in its place. For me, reading helps keep everything in check.  I learned a life lesson and can now control just how "artistic" I get.

A Relaxing Drive